You guys like beats that go thump thump that sound like the history channel?

For about three years now I've spent one night every two months trying to hunt down a demo tape that changed my life. In spring of 2003, my band was interrupted during what was probably our second rehersal ever of the "New Orleans Song." This jam was infamous in that it marked our guitarist Matt's first time busting out the wah pedal. He got so hooked to it, that some may maintain it is what lead to his getting kicked out, a subsequent feud, and a hilarious song, but I digress. Anyway, during this practice a blue motorbike pulls up to the open garage in which we were playing. A tall, skinny, blonde man somewhat resembling Ben Eager (google that shit, folks) stepped out to compliment us on our "blastin tune." Immediately, I expected this guy to be Clive Davis, or some other industry hubaloo, offering us something as career-making as a club show. However, as it turns out, said guy was much more concerned with promoting his own, Blue-Island based "skinhead band" that had thumping precussion and seemed like it could be straight out of "The History of WWII." Well, being the big oxymoron and unseen fans we were at the time, the boys of Last Breath were quite pumped to hear this skinhead band. No more than five minutes later, the bike, the man, and a chrsitmas themed demo tape were back to the garage, fulfilling our desire.



The cover of the tape itself needs a pretty thorough explanation. At first glance there is a neatly dranw snowman as seen through a nearby window; quite the winter scene. Christmas lights brightly adorned the edges of the tape's homemade cover. I remember Matt quite distinctly saying that it was a nice cover; he had not yet realized that the snow man sported a Hitler mustache, schwastika, and was gesturing in a rather anti-semetic way. The gallows, alluding to the hit single of the tape, in the background were a nice touch. Indeed, we had gotten our hands on a rare "Christmas in Auscwhitz" holiday treat from the band Crusaders of Kight/Dark Crusaders/god, I wish I could remember. Any hope that this was some tongue-in-cheek joke was lost when the lead synth player/vocalist of the band forced us to listen to the tape while he gauged our neo-nazi enthusiasm. The 8 songs included some gems such as the aforementioned "Gallows," "Aryan Drummerboy" "White Christmas" "Christmas in Auschwitz." I swear there was nothing more horrifying and remarkable than seeing our new friend air pound on the synth part to "Christmas in Buchenwald" (they weren't the most diversley titled songs, but Nazis aren't exactly big on diversity, so I guess this was appropriate-heh) anticipating Matt's parents pulling up to the driveway in Steve the SUV.

Once the nazi left, rather than "make copies of the tape to hand out to friends at school" as was suggested, Last Breath and the Murtaugh brothers found a nearby field, took a gallon of gasoline, one match and lit the tape-artwork and all-into oblivion, a rather fitting end all things considered. This is where my problem sets in. Why couldn't we have at least saved the Hitler snowman as proof that this awful thing really existed? So many people around me act like racism extreme nationalism, and a sense of white supremacy can be a-ok if exhibited in a half-hearted kind of manner; that, and some, just really buy into that bullshit. The nazi man in his big sun glasses, blue motor bike, wifebeater, playing his air synth that sounds like the history channel is such a wonderful reminder of just how fucktardian and toolish people who think they are part of a superior race/culture/clique/etc. always seem to be. So thank you Crusaders of the Knight, or whatever the hell you were called, for always offering a nice reminder of how not to look/act/play music/and just all around live.